24.10.2020 – 02:53am
Tonight I chose connection.
For the first time I really felt the grief and pain of a friend. I felt it like it’s in my own body. Instead of trying to help mentally, I chose to feel. And suddenly I understood. I understood the feelings in her, understood her motifs. And I realized I understood that what I have already seen and felt in myself.
So tonight, this quote speaks more to me than I could ever say in my own words:
What most people don’t know is: It is not pain that causes suffering – It is being in it alone. I know this hell first-hand. I know what it is like to be in pain and have people not tune into your reality. They think they are helping, but in reality they are just pushing their advice on you so they can quickly move on. When you are down, they want to „pull you out“ as fast as they can. But they forget one thing. And tonight I chose not to repeat this cycle. I decided to offer what I wished I had gotten. I offered what I have also gifted to myself: To feel the pain.
Feeling comes before everything else. Before we really feel and understand someone’s experience, any offered advice is useless. Staying with someone in pain; this is true presence.
Tonight, I can go to bed knowing I gave something to the best of my ability, which will become so crucial in the following years, and that is connection. And the wonderful thing about connection is that it’s a two-way street. You can’t give connection, without getting it back!
When you read these lines, I send you a big virtual hug. Whoever you are, I wish for you to experience true meaningful connection – you are here on earth for nothing less.
Lots of Love, Frauke ♥
[…] HSP Diary: Choose Connection […]