In this article, I will cover frequent aspects in the birth charts of virgins and late bloomers in love. And what you can do to finally blossom and attract lasting intimacy.
Important Note: Astrology describes tendencies and inner dynamics, not fixed destinies. Many of these aspects can also enable very mature, conscious, and deep relationships—sometimes it just takes more time to feel secure in yourself.
What is a birth chart?
A birth chart, or natal chart, captures the planet constellation of the sky at the time of your birth. All you need is your birth date, the birth time and the place, as close as possible. If you don’t know the exact time or place, an estimate might work as well. My favorite website to create a birth chart is https://astrotheme.com
1. Venus-Saturn aspects (conjunction, square, opposition)
Look at the angles that Venus and Saturn are forming in your birth chart. A conjunction means, the planets are close together, up until 5 degrees. Square means they are in a 90° angle to each other. And an opposition is when two planets are opposite each other, pretty self-explanatory, so 180 degrees apart.
If you have any of these aspects it might often indicate inhibitions, fears, or reservations in love. The person longs for a relationship but has unconscious fears of rejection or feels unlovable. It is because Saturn is the planet of hard work, restriction, delays, maturity. When it meets Venus, the planet of love, it puts delays and difficulties upon it.
Consequence: Relationships are delayed or taken very seriously, which can lead to a late entry into the romantic or sexual world.
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2. Venus in Virgo
Look at the sign your Venus sits in. If Venus is in Virgo in your birth chart, you might be someone who is critical, perfectionist, or shy in matters of the heart. You love deeply, but often quietly—with a tendency to only open up when “everything is right.”
Consequence: This can lead to a very cautious, delayed approach to romance and sexuality.
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3. Opposition Venus–Mars (especially Virgo–Pisces or other “weak” signs)
Venus represents love, Mars represents desire and drive. An opposition can indicate an inner conflict between love and lust – e.g., the feeling that one must choose between a deep connection or physical desire.
Consequence: Difficulties in opening up sexually and emotionally at the same time – can lead to inner ambivalence or blockage. I personally know someone with this placement who had no issue with „buying love“, but when it came to being intimate with someone they cared about, there was a huge blockage.
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4. Saturn in the 5th or 7th house
In which house is your Saturn located? As I mentioned earlier, Saturn brings delays, hard work, restrictions and responsibility to the house in which it is located.
Saturn In the 5th house: The 5th house is associated with playfulness, easy love, pleasure, dating. So if Saturn sits in this house it might cause inhibitions in spontaneous passion or difficulties relaxing.
Saturn in the 7th house: The 7th house is the house of partnerships and 1:1 conctact. You might take partnerships very seriously, and it might take you years to really commit and open up.
Consequence: tendency to start relationships late or to be single for a long time.
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5. Lilith or Chiron in conjunction with Venus or in the 5th/7th/8th house
Now with Chiron, we are looking at an asteroid. Chiron is often associated with your core wounding in life, but also where you can experience great healing in life. Lillith however is a mathematical point referring to the so-called „apogee“, i.e. the furthest point of the moon’s orbit away from Earth. It stands for primal feminine power, but also rejection and sexual taboo.
As mentioned before, the 5th house is the house of playfulness, easy love, pleasure and dating. The 7th house is the house of partnerships. And the 8th house is associated with trauma, death (literal and metaphorical), danger and risk-taking.
Consequence: Chiron and Lillith in these houses or conjunct Venus can indicate injuries, shame, or trauma related to sexuality or relationships. This results in insecurity, guilt, or fear of opening up sexually or in love.
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6. Pluto aspecting Venus (conjuncion, square, opposition)
Pluto is the planet of transformation, trauma and healing. It brings unimaginable depth, but also control issues, fear of losing power, or obsessive behavior. If pluto is aspecting Venus, the planet of beauty, harmony, this can cause friction in this area. An aspect means the planets are either conjunct („on top of each other“ or very close by 5 degrees), in a square (90 degrees) or in a opposition (180 degrees) to each other. Do you have any of this?
Consequence: intensity in relationships which can be frightening—some people withdraw or experience extreme delays before they can truly devote themselves to someone. But once they love, it’s usually deep.
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Honorable Mentions:
• Venus in the 12th house: Love is often kept secret, repressed, or associated with guilt/renunciation.
• Strong Virgo, Capricorn, or Saturn emphasis in general. Capricorn individuals in particular are often very rational rather than emotional, which can prove difficulties in romantic love.
• Chiron in the 8th house: Painful or suppressed sexuality. Can indicate sexual abuse.
I have one or several of these placements! What can I do about it?
If you want to resolve your blockages to romantic love and sexual matters in adult life, surface work usually won’t cut it. What is often needed to truly move forward, is to look at the deeper cause. It’s rooted in the first experiences you ever made in relationships, so usually with your family.
I just want to move on with my life! Why should I focus on my past?
Early-life trauma—such as emotional, physical, or sexual abuse or neglect—can become a primary reason why many adults struggle in romantic relationships and sexual matters. One key mechanism is that trauma disrupts the development of secure emotional bonds. Furthermore, trauma in early life has been linked to poorer emotional regulation and increased negative and fewer positive emotional responses during sexual or relational conflict. These disrupted mechanisms can lead to repeating dysfunctional relational patterns, difficulty with vulnerability, fear of abandonment, or avoidance of intimacy, all of which majorly impact romantic love and sexual functioning.
Tools that Help you Manifest the Love You Deserve
What if the key to finding lasting love wasn’t out there — but within you? So many of us carry unhealed emotional wounds from early life that quietly shape how we connect. Shadow work, especially emotional processing and parts work, offers a powerful path to freedom from these invisible chains. By meeting the “hidden” parts of yourself, the ones that hold pain, you can begin to understand and integrate them rather than suppress them. This inner reconciliation truly transforms isolation into authentic intimacy.
Unlike surface-level healing methods, shadow work gets to the root: it gently reveals why you react the way you do in love and empowers you to rewrite those patterns with compassion and awareness. When you honor every part of yourself, love stops being a battlefield and becomes a homecoming.
Step into this journey — not to become someone new, but to finally embrace all of who you are. Because when you heal your inner world, your outer world — and your relationships — transform naturally.
So, give it a shot! What do you have to loose?
If you like, you can contact me and we can look at how you can bring intimacy and love into your life in a coaching session. My approach is compassionate and kind, offering you a soft and hope-filled guidance for your life journey.
Lots of love, Frauke ♥
